four dumb letters

fill your cup to the brim, because you can. and you’re not alone.

clear your mind of cant


the city of music

  you should know that nashville is incredible. we love living here for lotsa reasons. don’t worry, i’ll  share them all with you eventually, but first a few need to knows…

 tv lies. duh. nashville is not just…

but…is also, and more importantly this…
burgs with local bookstores & boutiques

locally sourced cafes & trendy coffee houses
and so much more than just hank & dolly. promise.  you’ll see bit by bit. 
this is a terrible and tiny post and does nashville no justice. but, i’m tired. it’s late. and i’m just tryin’ to keep my commitment, homies. more goods comin’ your way soon.
sleep tight! 
p.s. hey, like the new site & design?!

I blog with BE Write

my main squeeze

over the past few months, i’ve watched my husband push and fight towards his career dreams.  after trying for so long, it happened. the doors opened. i’m talking like swung open. WIDE. and, he has like the coolest job.  but I think i’ve got the best seat in all of this…i’m thoroughly enjoying watching him from the sidelines:) 
there is some kind of special something that happens when the one you love, loves their everyday.
::that has been our mantra this year::
i have to say, the more you believe: the more you’ll receive. kitschiknow itworks    jesusisthereasonforournewseason
art by Michael Mullen  
here he is, my guy. circa 08. {was my first pic of him!}

747! what what! been keeping it up…minus last night when hubs tucked this tuckered mama in early…like before 9. lame i know…but, it happens.

I blog with BE Write

two teeth + seven months

being a mama is hard, y’all. Fo realz. it can be isolating and challenging. you get left out of things, forgotten & overlooked. and are now not just the married friends, but the ones with “kids”. it’s a season that really no other experience can prepare you for. but each day, good & hard ones, brings a depth and beauty so rich that the dirt weighing down the day (sometimes literally) makes it so much more than worth it. i’m daily showered with warmth and strength that is revitalizing. 
i’m constantly amazed that even when I think im dunzo and have no more, nothing, not an ounce left to give, that a glimpse of this boy, our boy, can remedy my pity and energize my bones.
the point is, our boy is 7 months. and, he’s perfect. 
we’re blessed with more than we deserve.
it’s so cray. it really does happen fast, y’all.

i mean, those little toofs.
almost crawling.
he can’t get enough of standing. crawl before walk? maybe not for this bug.

i mean…what can I say? we’ve got a cute one here.

oh, Ollie boy. you bring us more than we could’ve ever, eva imagined. you continually remind me of miracles and true beauty as you show me what this world and our journey is all about. you da best!
keeping it up, yo!

I blog with BE Write

the real deal.


let’s get real, y’all. life is not an instagram pic. and life, just doesn’t come with 1-touch filters that instantly make life cropped, vibrant, or trendy.
i, unfortunately, sometimes,  measure my day, mommahood, abilities, schedule, food,  etc. with others and their pictures. i mean, come on. that’s dumb. it’s a picture! a fleeting moment…and, one that someone most likely rehearsed to get perfect. 
pictureperfect that is. sorry I just had to.
so, in my effort to get real with my 7for7 challenge, here’s the real pic roll.
here is the evolution of picture taking with a my-mama-is-crazay baby boy.

laughing first…

Slash he might be kind a scerrrred.

then smiling. because that’s our favorite.

with a slice of appeasing mama, again, as she tries to get the perfect picture for the umpteenth time. 

and finally, over it. nothanks alldone wheresmypaci getmeouttahere

oh and yes, btw, after i ask ollie questions, i respond for him too. momzimdunzo
seventeen pics later and we’ve yet to get a good, not fuzzy shot. and that’s gonna have to be ok. my husband says sometimes you just gotta be in the moment, not the camera.
wise words, hubs. i’m working on that being in the moment and relishing it thing. 
over and out. thanks for reading. love to hear your thoughts.

I blog with BE Write

becoming me.

so clearly, it’s been a while. a long while. and i’m thinking, it’s time. time for me to get back at this blog/writing/getting-it-out-of-my-head-thing.

i’ve realized that it’s time to work on my everyday. can i just let this out for a minute? my day gets lost in things too often that do NOT matter. repeat (mainly for my self) do.not.matter. (e.g. FB, IG, the twitt, asos, and clearly i could go on)

i found this quote. and i like it.


and, i’m thinking about saying something. making it blog official.                              aka, commitment. something i tend to haaaaate.


i’m going to blog daily. gulp. ya, i just think i need to. i like doing it, and i want to do it. so why not. i feel like the honest i can pour forth, sometimes, can maybe help someone else know they are not the only one.

but, let’s start small. for now, expect a blog each day for the next week. so, it’s wednesday night…that means until next wednesday. we’ll call it 7-for-7.                      7 blogs for 7 days. #747

i have five fingers, like you too (i hope) and i use those to keep track of my day. there are five things/areas i like to complete everyday

1) reflection/prayer time 2)quality time with J. 3)quality time with Ollie        4)efficient house and professional work 5)exercisio, aka getting my butt active

i just feel better when i’ve, at the least, spent 10 5 minutes doing each of the above.

at some point, i’ve gotta grow up and let go of this little girl that gets lazy and become the wife and mama i envision in my mind. baby steps, i know. it’s for no one else but me, but by supporting myself in the ways i know possible, i’ll be able to pour out a deeper love to all around me. and honestly, that’s all that matters.

join me? i’d love to keep up the challenge with others!

here’s to being who we want to be. errday.

xo,                                                                                                                                                       jacq


wow. so much to say, so little time. or, uh, precious time that is : )

for now, enjoy these oh-so-sweet photos taken by the wonderful Rhiannon DeBaylo

*photos taken 2/10/13*

DSC_0179 BW DSC_0242 BW DSC_0241 DSC_0230 creamy DSC_0212 BW DSC_0200 BW DSC_0184 BW

that’s our lovebug. thanks for capturing these sweet moments, Rhi!

now…to choose a favorite to hang!? which one do you like the best?










the first man.

he tells me everyday i’m the prettiest girl.

he’s proud of everything i do.

he cries every time i leave home.

and he makes me laugh hysterically.

he’s my dad.

my dad has a way of making you laugh, encouraging you, and believing in you.   he’ll also let you know the safest place to park at the mall, he can tell you all the latest crime locations to avoid, and will remind you tenbazillion times before you leave his presence to “know your surroundings”. funny dad

he’s helped kids get off the streets and into sports (football of course 🙂 and he’s changed a young girl’s life by helping her have the courage to commit to her pregnancy. he’s not only loved on our family, but has encouraged, challenged, mentored, and just down right changed the lives of many. he’s known for his heart. he’s built a legacy already and i’ll forever be proud to be his girl.


and if you know him, you know he has these sayings. and of all those silly things he’s said a thousand times over the years, the one that rings truer now than ever before is “you’ll understand one day, when you have kids”

well, daddy, i do. and i’m incredibly thankful for you, who are are, and what you stand for. your heart and love for us is mighty.

tonight as i fed my baby boy, i looked into his sweet, peaceful eyes and i told him all  about our sweet family. i cried as i thought of how truly blessed we are. not only to have such an incredible poppa, but the warmth and love of an amazing, kind, and generous family. thank you Lord, my well and o

happy birthday, poppa.

all my love,

your little girl, jacq

p.s. thanks for teaching me how to love my                                                                                 little O : )

p.p.s just for fun, our little nugget

the longest & hardest, most beautiful day

it was friday. our family had all flown and driven hundreds of miles to be this sweet baby bean and we were anxious. they had already been here a week.

i had tried it all. castor oil, walks, bouncing on yoga balls, eating a whole pineapple, spicy foods, labor inducing cookies, and…nada.

later that day, we walked around the adorable downtown franklin, looked in the world’s most expensive baby boutique, and then decided what i needed was a massage. off we went to the mall where you know those guys that give massages in the middle of the mall on those chair things? ya. we did that at 3:30 on that friday. then we went home and group texted our small group to PRAY!!! you see, the fam was all scheduled to leave on Sunday…and that was TWO days away! and this family girl couldn’t bear the thought of baby bean being born without them.

then about 6, i sat down to eat some spaghetti. i stood up and…um, excuse me, grabbed myself because i thought…hmm, that doesn’t feel right. surely i haven’t lost the ability to “hold it”. i casually walked  to the bathroom in our bedroom, and yelled in the house full of anxious-to-be-grandparents for j.

“i think my water broke?”

::seconds later::

“THE WATER IS BROKEN!!!!!!” j shouted into the room filled with the anxious-t0-be-grandparents. they all scurried to get ready while i just sat on the toilet with the trickle of the broken water. we decided i’d wait to go in until contractions began. my dad immediately freaked out as my answer didn’t match up with his latest google search. oh gotta love him 🙂

i laid down. at 8:30 they started. they were almost immediately around 5 minutes apart. eek. this is really freaking happening. they were getting more intense so i got in the shower until the hot water ran out. my midwife told me i could come into the hospital whenever i wanted, and the absence of the hot water was my cue. we arrived at vanderbilt around 11ish, and i was in the labor tub before 12.

the tub, though, wasn’t able to be hotter than 100 degrees and that was not doing it. if i was going to have this baby naturally, i was going to need something more intense to curb the intense sensations. ah, the shower. unlimited hot water. that i could control…that was my thought and that’s where i went.

i sat on the bench in the shower, and j stood next to me. i don’t even know how long i sat there. i kept my head out of the water at first because i wanted to look pretty for pictures ::ha:: that didn’t last long. it felt even more amazing for the gush of the water to completely overcome me. j kept telling me to give into the contraction. embrace it. and ya know, it helped. if i just let it be and force my body to relax, because as you may know your body does NOT want to relax, the contraction would be easier to take on.

i prayed so much during those moments. GOD TAKE THIS PAIN AWAY! i never wanted to think of it as pain…but in that moment, i cried out. i apparently also asked for a candy bar. either way, neither happened 🙂

vandy is one of the few hospitals in the nation that uses nitrous oxide. it doesn’t take pain away, but takes off the “edge”. i wanted it. i had researched it and knew it was the only thing that you could do that wouldn’t pass to the baby.

“breathe it in, baby ” he said. i did that. and it made me feel a little tipsy. it didn’t take any pain away, but it almost forced my body to relax. it was amazing. i’m so glad i did it.

it was almost time for a shift change. meaning it was almost 7 am saturday morning. they checked me again and said i was at 9.5 cm. i told her i had the urge to push, and so push i did.

holy wwwwwhoa. i didn’t know that part would be so hard.

“umm, i think i’m pushing from the wrong part”

they assured my i wasn’t. so, on i went. i laid on my side for awhile and pushed. it was after 7 and i had been up since 6am the day before, so tired doesn’t describe it. at some point they had given me an iv of sugar water bc the baby bean wasn’t moving a ton and said it would help my energy. but it apparently was wearing off on me and i was struggling to be awake. i would drift to a semi-nap state between my urges to push.

i never thought i’d push on my back, but i was so tired i couldn’t even think of moving. they had this upside down shaped U bar that connected to my bed. i could hike my legs up and push against that. well, that certainly helped.

“ok, now deep breath. hold it for 10 seconds and push”

“ok, i’m ready. ugggggggghhhhhhhh” i did my best to push for 10 full seconds but would run out of breath almost every time. i put the nitrous aside. it was time for business. and after 2 hours of pushing, she said “ok, reach down and pull your baby”


i did, and directly on my chest he went.


i can’t even explain what i felt. the moment was here. i just stared. and gawked.

Oliver Henry, at 6 pounds 14 ounces and 20 inches was officially here.

love, as i thought i had known, doesn’t begin to define the emotions felt.

this love was so incredibly different.


i must say, i was proud of myself. i sometimes make goals i don’t keep, but between jesus, j’s belief in me, and determination…a natural birth was had.

time to snuggle the little one.



a cheerful chill.

i don’t know what it is, but there is something about fall.

i’m giddy, eager, and ready for each day. there is little that could swipe away my inner grin. nostalgia immediately permeates my being with even subtle changes in temps. i may have not experienced this growing up, but pinto sure will.  something about the true crunch of the leaves and the crispness in the air…it’s like there’s a scent and sound to fall–it’s all so much, so grand, and so good.

i’m so thankful for days like these. pinto, sugar, i hope you’ll find the time to relish these sweet littles, too. we’re so thankful for your health, your 10 toes, your adorable nose, and sweet little lips. be warned: i’m gonna eat your face up : )

these little things make me grin.

fall benches 





cities, reminding me of memories and great movies (who doesn’t love You’ve Got Mail?!!!!)









and while not a little thing, presents in the mail, particularly pertaining to pinto sure do create an easy  heart grin. 








and, i’d be a fool to say clothes don’t do it to me every time : )

(last pic photo cred: the sartorialist)